October marks Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month, a time to honor and remember the many families who have experienced the devastating loss of a pregnancy or an infant. For many, this kind of loss can feel isolating and overwhelming, but it is important to know that you are not alone. Support is available both nationally and locally in North Carolina to help families through their grief and healing process.

The Importance of Awareness

Pregnancy and infant loss is more common than many realize. According to the CDC, about 1 in 4 pregnancies end in miscarriage, and in 2020 alone, over 20,000 infants died in the United States. While these statistics are sobering, they underscore the importance of providing support and resources for families affected by these losses.

For those who endure such loss, the grief can be overwhelming and isolating. Often termed “disenfranchised grief,” this unique sorrow is one that society doesn’t always openly acknowledge or support, adding layers of pain to an already devastating experience. One of the most difficult aspects of this grief is that it can often feel invisible or misunderstood by others. In the case of pregnancy and infant loss, parents may feel that their grief is minimized or ignored because the loss is not always seen as “legitimate” or equivalent to other forms of death. Many families are consoled with dismissive phrases like “at least you can try again.” Parents grieving the loss of a baby or pregnancy are not only mourning the physical absence of their child but also the imagined future they had planned. Many do not acknowledge that the bond a parent feels with their child often begins when they discover they are expecting. The brevity of life does not lessen the significance of the loss.

It is crucial to recognize that the grief stemming from pregnancy and infant loss is valid, real, and deserves the same attention and care as any other form of bereavement. Families who have experienced this type of loss should feel empowered to grieve openly, without the burden of societal expectations or judgment.

North Carolina Resources

For families in North Carolina, there are several organizations and resources available to help navigate the grief associated with pregnancy and infant loss:

1. RTZ Hope (Return to Zero Hope) – Triangle Chapter
   RTZ Hope provides peer support, counseling, and community for families and health providers who have experienced pregnancy or infant loss. The Triangle Chapter hosts support groups and remembrance events throughout the year including their Wave of Light Virtual Gathering on October 15th. Website: RTZ Hope
2. Heartstrings
   This organization offers peer-based support for parents who have lost a pregnancy or infant. Heartstrings is based in Winston-Salem, NC, but their virtual support groups are open to anyone in North Carolina. They also offer online memorial events during Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month. Website: Heartstrings Support
3. TEARS Foundation – North Carolina Chapter
   The TEARS Foundation provides financial assistance for funeral costs, emotional support, and support groups to families coping with pregnancy and infant loss. The North Carolina chapter also offers outreach programs and remembrance ceremonies during October. Website: TEARS Foundation
4. UNC Health Bereavement Services
   UNC Health offers comprehensive bereavement services for families who have experienced the loss of a child. This includes counseling, memorial services, and support groups through the UNC Medical Center in Chapel Hill. Website: UNC Health Bereavement

National Resources

There are also a number of national organizations dedicated to supporting families through pregnancy and infant loss. These organizations offer a wide variety of resources, including online support groups, educational materials, and virtual remembrance events.

1. Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep (NILMDTS)
   NILMDTS provides professional remembrance photography to families facing the loss of a baby. They have volunteer photographers throughout the country who can come to hospitals or homes to create lasting memories for grieving families.
   Website: Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep
2. Share Pregnancy and Infant Loss Support
   Share offers national online and in-person support groups, resources, and educational materials to families who have experienced pregnancy or infant loss. They also organize the annual October Wave of Light, where families across the world light candles in remembrance of lost infants and pregnancies. Website: Share Pregnancy and Infant Loss Support
3. March of Dimes
   March of Dimes is known for its advocacy and research efforts to prevent infant loss and support families affected by premature birth and miscarriage. They offer educational resources, support programs, and bereavement guides for families. Website: March of Dimes

How You Can Get Involved

For those who have not experienced pregnancy or infant loss but want to offer support, here are a few ways to get involved:

• Participate in the Wave of Light on October 15: Light a candle at 7:00 PM in memory of the babies gone too soon. Families around the world will join in this gesture of remembrance.
• Attend or support local remembrance events: Many organizations host walks, memorial services, or fundraisers in October. Your attendance can show solidarity and support for grieving families.
• Donate to pregnancy and infant loss organizations: Consider donating to national or local organizations that provide crucial support and services to families experiencing loss.

Pregnancy and infant loss are deeply personal and emotional experiences. At Therapeutic Partners, we are committed to offering compassionate care to support families during times of grief. Let’s come together this October to raise awareness, provide support, and honor the babies who are forever in our hearts.